Editor’s note: This is one wife’s plea to the world to recognize that her husband is a good man, innocent of the charges he faces. We share this personal testimony because it is the real-world portrait of the experience published on our blog last week: because his church accepts tithes and offerings, a serious believer and church leader has been charged with theft and deception.
Some of the details in this essay, as his wife takes care to point out his strengths as a Chinese husband, father, and son, may sound strange to Western ears. But they are an important part of Chen Ying’s argument to society that her husband is not the predator he is accused of being. While Han Xiaodong’s name has been defamed, his wife wants people to know that her husband is actually a good and upright citizen.
This version has been slightly edited and condensed from the original Chinese for length and clarity.
My Story
My name is Chen Ying, and Han Xiaodong is my husband. We live in Linfen, Shanxi Province. My husband used to be a middle school teacher, but he quit and is now a house church pastor. We met in college. We saved money to get married, to renovate our house, buy a car, and to raise our three children. Our life was modest, but happy.
I do not understand what has happened to Xiaodong, but I want to share my experiences with him.
On August 19, 2022, my husband was with our children at a tourist attraction on a nearby mountain when he was seized by officials. On August 22, he was illegally placed under “residential surveillance at a designated location” for “suspected fraud.” On September 2, he was placed under criminal detention, and on September 30, he was officially arrested. He is now detained at a detention center here in Linfen.
I do not understand what has happened to Xiaodong, but I want to share my experiences with him.
A Good Teacher
Xiaodong was a good teacher, who taught technology and computer science at a middle school for many years. He eventually became the computer science department’s lead teacher, and also coached the robotics and computing competition.
Whether he was teaching technology or robotics, Xiaodong’s teaching was always humorous and insightful. His students loved and admired him.
For many years, Xiaodong taught laboratory courses in his spare time without any compensation, while other teachers and students were off for dinner. Colleagues and school leaders recognized and respected his excellent teaching skills and outstanding work.
A Good Husband
My husband loves me. Every night, he washed my feet and rubbed my back. Although he was very busy, he often helped me with chores and took care of the children. He cleaned my shoes, took out the trash, and carefully cleaned the kitchen. He was the one who always cleaned the filthy toilet and the floor drain.
Raising children can be full of worries, fatigue, pain, and helplessness. But in every difficult moment, Xiaodong was with me, empathizing and sharing my pain. He never looked down on little things I did, or blamed me for shortcomings.
How could I not love to the end a husband like this?
On July 1, 2021, because of my negligence, my daughter and I were playing a game by the water when we fell into the lake and almost drowned. Xiaodong immediately jumped into the water and helped us to shore. His phone was ruined, but he did not blame or complain, but instead consoled me.
His sacrificial love, companionship, commitment, and tolerance and understanding encouraged me to have more children with him. When I was pregnant, I often worried about the baby, but he always gently and firmly comforted me, saying, “I will love the baby no matter what. It is given by God!”
How could I not love to the end a husband like this?
A Good Father
Every day, no matter how busy, when Xiaodong came home, he hugged, tickled, or lifted the children above his head. He played with them in various ways, making them laugh.
Our oldest child loves books, and Xiaodong read her piles and piles of books. Our second child loves fish. Xiaodong made up imaginative stories about fish, sharing them with our son. Xiaodong was a good storyteller; I was always fascinated, and our children couldn’t get enough.
He also taught our children to draw, read, and play the harp and piano. With him around, the children were never bored. He was busy, and didn’t have time to do everything for our children, but he read many parenting books and often shared them with me.
Xiaodong’s love, laughter, gentleness, and love left a deep imprint on our children. Even after he had been arrested for a long time, one day my daughter was chatting with her grandfather about finding a good husband when she grew up. She shook her head: “No, I want to find a man like my daddy.”
A Good Son
Xiaodong loves his parents very much, and is good at understanding their feelings and thoughts. Even when we have different ideas from them, he always considers and respects their opinions. Whenever he visited his parents, whom he did not see very often, he often talked with them for a half or even a whole day, sharing about home, work, and church, as well as about our children.
Xiaodong is as attentive and considerate to his parents as a daughter, which comforts and makes his parents happy. If conflicts arise, he mediates the in-law relationship between us, to make sure none of us feel wronged.
He also loves my parents very much. My family dynamic was complicated, and I did not have a good relationship with my parents. Xiaodong did not mind this, but loved and accepted my parents more than I did. He was patient, and helped me reconcile with them. He wrote letters to my parents, and often prayed for my family.
A Good Brother
No matter how small, Xiaodong took to heart the needs of brothers and sisters [in our church]. He did his best to help, inviting those with financial difficulties to eat and live with him for a month or two. Although he himself did not often eat out because he did not want to spend money, he often took brothers and sisters out to eat because he saw their needs and loneliness. He often said it was easy to eat and talk, but it took patience to help the weak. The first step was taking the initiative to get closer and find out what they really needed.
All these identities are based on the fact that Xiaodong is a Christian. His faith has renewed him from the inside out, and sustained him to this day.
Xiaodong’s love did not stop there. He fixed computers, helped people move, officiated at weddings and funerals, reconciled relationships between husbands and wives, and talked with children and the elderly. He often invited other brothers and sisters to our home for dinner, treating them with the best meat, vegetables, and fruits.
He visited those who were sick or lacking. After seeing their needs, he generously provided financial help. He was simultaneously both very frugal in saving money, and very generous in giving it.
One sister said, “Xiaodong is very reliable. You don’t have to worry about what you have asked him to do. He can take care of the children, and clean up dog poop. When I couldn’t make ends meet, he lent me money, not thinking about if I could pay it back.”
Last Words
All these identities are based on the fact that Xiaodong is a Christian. His faith has renewed him from the inside out, and sustained him to this day.
This is my husband, the kind of person for whom I was willing to move across the country to spend my life with. Even though our life is not rich and we often lack things; even though sometimes I may have to eat sprouted potatoes or slightly rotten tomatoes (this used to make me upset) – because of Xiaodong, I am willing, happy, and content.
This is the Han Xiaodong I know as his wife. If, today, someone tells you that Han Xiaodong defrauded you of your money, will you believe that person?
I want to share one more thing. Three times, Xiaodong accidentally scratched someone else’s car. He always tried his best to contact the owners to compensate. If he couldn’t find the owner, he foolishly kept waiting at the same spot.
Abraham Lincoln once said, “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.” I choose to make these things public so that all may see him: faithful, trustworthy, honest, and with no guile. How could public security officers see such a reassuring and trustworthy person as a fraud?
This is the Han Xiaodong I know as his wife. If, today, someone tells you that Han Xiaodong defrauded you of your money, will you believe that person?
Chen Ying is the wife of Han Xiaodong, an imprisoned house church pastor in Linfen, Shanxi Province.
Pray for Han Xiaodong, Chen Ying, and their family.
