Cross-Cultural Sacrifice in My Own Backyard
Several months ago, some of our dearest Chinese friends came into town and took my husband and I out for dinner. The evening with them was great and we enjoyed hearing about the fascinating things they do in life. We often call them our “Chinese bohemians” because they are constantly traversing the world in search of true beauty and ideals. Sometimes it seems like they were born a century too late for their passions. We love them greatly. Since that night, however, I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching regarding the difficulties of cross-cultural friendship. There were many uncomfortable things about our dinner together that night. As with anyone living outside of their home culture, our friends have a lot of quirks. They are still unaccustomed to American restaurant dining, and of course they struggle with various linguistic and cultural expectations. How do you interact appropriately with the waitress? Do you really have to tip that much money? I found myself worrying most of the evening about how to maintain the good graces of our waitress and the other patrons, while at the same time honoring our friends’ Chinese expectations as the dinner’s hosts.
