Editor’s note: The House Church in China Podcast tells the stories of the modern Chinese house church. In the last five years, over 1.5 million people have left mainland China to settle in foreign countries: some for education, some for family, and some for jobs. But a tiny percentage of them left for foreign missions, seeking to obey Jesus’ Great Commission to make disciples of all nations. How did two non-believing individuals from China become missionaries? In season four, we hear their story.
Today, we are proud to publish an excerpt from Season 4, Episode 1. We’ll begin with a peek into Daisy’s life, and hear how her heart was prepared to meet Jesus.
For the last few centuries, when we think of foreign missions, we imagine Christians from the West traveling thousands of miles to reach people in other continents. As recent as 80 years ago, China was still a mission field in which Western missionaries labored and died. That dynamic is about to change.
This is the story of two non-believers who met Jesus, followed him, and – eventually – became missionaries.
In the last five years, over 1.5 million people have left mainland China to settle in foreign countries: some for education, some for family, and some for jobs. But a tiny percentage of them left for foreign missions, seeking to obey Jesus’ Great Commission to make disciples of all nations. This is the story of two non-believers who met Jesus, followed him, and – eventually – became missionaries.
“I Cannot Find the Truth”
Daisy grew up in a spiritual family where from a very young age, she suspected that there must be a God somewhere, even though she did not know who this God is, or if there are many gods. She was surrounded by fortune tellers, and she heard stories of ancestors reincarnated as grandkids. She followed her mom to pray in temples. Her mom sold paper money that Chinese people burned to honor their ancestors in the underworld, and in return, these ancestors’ spirits will bless their families with wealth and fortunes.
“My mom always takes me to burn the papers for my grandparents. And every time when we burn that kind of paper money for them, she would ask them to bless me, bless my children. And she could also tell different things from the flame. When we burn the papers, the flames are different. Sometimes she said it’s a good sign, it’s a bad sign. I experienced a lot of that.”
Life experience told me that what the school is teaching me is not always the truth. I have to find the truth, but I cannot.
While teachers in Chinese public schools insist that such practices are superstitious and anti-science, Daisy actually found them more plausible than total atheism.
“Because my life experience told me that evolution is not true. Because one thing I’m sure is that if you told me that your ancestor is a monkey, I cannot accept. That means I’m not human, I’m an animal. I felt that’s so silly. So life experience told me that what the school is teaching me is not always the truth. I have to find the truth, but I cannot.”
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The existence of a spiritual reality haunted Daisy as she grew up, and at times quite literally.
“When I was in fifth grade, I had a very traumatic experience. My classmates told me by the riverside, there is a dead baby there. I can remember how I got there, but I don’t remember what I saw. From that time on, there was a little baby with me every day. It’s a little baby in red and blue cotton. Every time I sleep, he is just by my side, every day. So I realized that there is something. When people died, it’s not the end.”
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The image of the dead baby also reinforced another concern in Daisy’s childhood. Under China’s strict one-child policy, it was not uncommon for parents to abandon their newborns in the hospital or on a busy street, particularly if the newborn has birth defects.
“We Are Kind of Like Garbage”
It is not uncommon for parents to joke that they scooped up their children from under a tree. While this may sound strange to Western ears, it was a subtly humorous way Chinese parents discipline their children, as if saying, “If you don’t get your acts together, we can just put you right back where we found you!”
All of this made Daisy question: what is our worth in this world?
I felt that humans do not deserve to live in such a beautiful world. Because we are kind of like garbage, and we create garbage every day. Is there anything good I can do on this earth?
“One thing I remember very clearly is when I was about six or seven years old, I asked my mom very seriously where I came from. And my mom, like other traditional Chinese people, said, ‘I just picked you up through the garbage.’ That was a shock to me. It means I’m kind of garbage.”
Even though Daisy would eventually realize that all of this was simply a joke, the question of her worth continued to haunt her through college and graduate school.
“This might be the reason I felt that humans do not deserve to live in such a beautiful world. Because we are kind of like garbage, and we create garbage every day. Is there anything good I can do on this earth, in this universe? I don’t think we have anything good.”
Daisy is a pseudonym for a Chinese Christian serving God in missions.
Pray for the people of China to know they are precious and beloved in the sight of their Creator.
